I should by listening to the leaders’ French debate but for the last 15 minutes I have been privy to a great tolling of church bells.  I miss that at home – it is a sound I love.  There are also street musicians and people walking and talking outside my Auberge’s windows (the large European style of windows, open wide on this unusually warm end of September day).

This was a day of ‘rest’ before picking up Selva tomorrow. I have been walking since 9 this morning.  I do not know how they can live with so many tourists! Unbelievable,

but for me it is to the bookstores and the few antique shops left!  I have to decide if my talking to strangers is a good thing, a desire to share with fellow man, or a reflection of the need of someone who lives alone and who generally is happy in her own company to ‘get it all out’ of my system.  Today I made one lady cry, taught a museum volunteer about my ancestor who built a house on the museum grounds in the 17th century, made a mother smile when I commented to her child about his dinosaur imitation, engaged a waiter and restaurant manager in a quest for horse steak at another restaurant, any restaurant (sorry to the squeamish but in any case did not find any) transformed a surly antique dealer into a passionate co-collector of wooden spoons who went on a search of a history book to show me a photo of his collection that was featured. By the way, the lady who cried, she sold me a boiled wool scarf, but we got to talking and one thing to another I told her about my big purchase tomorrow, which lead to questions about how safe I felt and how brave I was, which led to me telling her I had driven bigger before my husband died, which lead to living alone as a ‘mature’ lady, her finding of the ‘perfect man ‘ when she least expected it etc.  I did not make her sob but she discretely wiped tears as I was talking.  I could think I am rather pathetic to tell people so much about myself but you know, people are interested in people and like Tiny Tim observed (A Christmas Carol, Charles Dickens for the uninitiated) and I paraphrase but if it makes people think and appreciate what they have terrific – in any event it will be a part of their day that will leave a little mark.

The piety of the desperate.

A little aside, I have always said a prayer and lit a candle when I visit churches.  On trips with Don since he became sick we visited even more churches and lit so many candles:  I called it the piety of the desperate. I always enjoyed going to mass in Europe though, we have been in France, Italy, Hungary – it is an interesting measure of a community.  My best mass ever was a very humble service in the most opulent cathedral of Chartres. In any case, the point of this aside is that today I did something that I think I have never done.  When I lit a candle and said my prayer I said it for me, not for the intention of family members which I realized with a start I have done all my live.  Another milestone, of sorts.